Adjusting to Retirement: Mayhem by Mandolin

A kitchen catastrophe

It doesn’t take long for someone who has worked for over four decades at a high pressure, very precise profession to get bored when he or she retires.  Deadlines, productivity and outcome measures are replaced by open schedules, lack of affirmation and dubious successes. No wonder that several very skilled medical, legal and educational professionals who are newly retired have struggled with the adjustment to no longer having an operating room, courtroom or classroom waiting for them. These former captains of their ships are now on shore duty at their homes. Some with hobbies, interests, projects and grandchildren can slip easily into their new leisurely lifestyle. Many, however, have long forgotten about what they enjoy doing in their spare time or what else besides their careers that they are good at. 

     Watching my husband, a newly retired surgeon adjust to retirement has been very interesting and challenging for both of us. Sharing the same space, having all of our meals together and no longer having an office away from home which served as an oasis is certainly a new experience. 

     I’ve decided that moving into retirement is like having to get sea legs for a different voyage. Things like sharing a kitchen, dividing up household chores and having a multitude of together time is an acquired skill for most people. It is amazing to me that I have been able to manage without the reorganizational suggestions my husband hasmade or the new products that come home from the grocery store when he shops without me. 

     Most striking to me has been the assumption made by several husbands of friends who were recently retired from very skilled careers. There has been a tendency for  them to assume that if they have mastered medical instruments and equipment then they should be perfectly capable of transferring that skill set to kitchen tools. The most dangerous of which is the mandolin. For those unfamiliar with this hazardous device, it is a special blade which enables one to cut extremely thin slices of ingredients like potatoes which would be hard to cut into slivers using a just a knife. Designed for experienced chefs not overly enthusiastic amateurs. 

     When I first heard about a friend’s husband using one, I assumed he was playing a musical instrument. Next thing I hear is that he cut the tip of his finger off while trying to thinly slice vegetables. Never having owned or even used one, I had no idea about how dangerous such an utensil could be until my husband, no stranger to using a scalpel, also cut the tip of his finger off with the mandolin he had excitedly purchased and brought home. 

     As word about the mandolin injury got out, I heard of three more highly educated new retirees who had been injured while prepping food with a mandolin. Fortunately,  none were serious injuries, and all of the culprit implements were disposed of or returned to their places of purchase. 

      Perhaps there should be a “black box” warning on mandolins cautioning those individuals who are newly retired to stay away from them for a significant period of time. Find a safer activity than gourmet cooking which requires use of this digital guillotine.  

     It has occurred to me that in the same way that we have orientation weeks for about-to-be college student familiarizing them with life on campus, maybe we should also have an ‘orientation to retirement’ session which reacquaints the soon-to-be retired person with life without a job. Projects that need doing around the house would be a good place to start followed by an orientation to cupboards, kitchen and closets so that the need to constantly require help to find things or the urge to rearrange things can be avoided. My kitchen, which had always worked well for me, is now being shared by another person who has decided that relocating my utensils will improve efficiency. This is not helping my ‘flow’, and I am tempted to venture into the garage and  offer him the same service with his tools. 

     We have reached the six month anniversary of his retirement, and the days are getting smoother, the yelling has gotten less, and the time that we share has been much more enjoyable. And, the home repairs have gotten done, so he has more time to move on to rearranging the linen closet.